In any and all courtships, there are five stages of non-verbal communication that occur. No matter what culture, society, or demographics that a person has, they will always follow these stages in their courtship. Let’s take a look at the five stages and what is involved with each one.
The first stage in courtship is getting attention. You want to let people know that you are single and looking. You do this through your posture, movements, facial expressions, clothing, and other forms of communication that are all non-verbal. You are getting attention in a very subtle way.
Your second stage is learning to read body language. After you have gotten attention, you need to start looking for positive signs from those around you. You are looking for who is responding to your signs asking for attention. Who recognizes your non-verbal cues and is in tune enough to show an interest in them? These are all things that you will see in the body language of the people that are around you. This can tell you a lot about whom to move on to the next stage of courtship with.
In the third stage, verbal communication is introduced. Once you know who is interested, you can start talking with them. However, this stage is also mostly centered on non-verbal communication. There are many things that can be implied by simply saying, “Hello” to someone. It is all in body language and tone of voice.
You can get a good understanding of how things are progressing by what is not being said. Pay close attention to the non-verbal signs that people are giving off. If you see cues that are saying the person is definitely interested, it is much easier to approach them and say Hello. It is also much less frightening and awkward this way.
The fourth stage of courtship involves physical touch. This stage can be very subtle and start out completely innocently. There could be an accidental brushing up against someone or an accidental touch. The response that is received is what will determine where this stage goes. If the person is not interested in taking things further, their non-verbal communication will clearly display this. They will give off clear signs that they have no interest in what is going on. There are different time frames for this stage to last. It is different for each individual couple and their unique situations.
The last stage in courtship involves adding intimacy and sex to the relationship. Once again, as with the first four stages, the non-verbal cues should be your guide in moving forward in this stage. Cuddling, gazing, stroking, kissing, holding hands and other ways to show and display affection will all present themselves during this stage.
If you do not see these signs from your partner, then you are not both ready to move into this stage. When people are intimate with each other, their body language will be very clear. However, their voice and tone will change as well. After all, tone of voice and how we speak can go a long way towards letting our partner know how interested we are in them and how much we desire them and the intimacy that is to follow.